Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Topic

Comics about drinking

Beer and alcohol at Duke: the frats go dry, the kegs go to Mars (no alcohol laws), and the still comes down for Parents’ Weekend.

17 comics about this topicNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 1 #407. Jokes about beer

April 21, 1999

GOD: It's ALL been you, Johnny. Ben, your roommate, who values nonconformity as much as you do conformity. Jen, the girl you want and everyone else seems to have.

GOD: Jay, who put words to your unspoken relationship troubles. Even STU, the computer, was a manifestation of your struggles to balance innocence with knowledge.

JOHNNY: So explain Fratman and Sorority Girl.

GOD: Look, people just like jokes about beer and hooking up, don't over-analyze things.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 2 #395. Staying superficial

April 5, 1999

JAY: Fratman, you and Sorority Girl seem to have a stable relationship. How do you do it?

FRATMAN: The KEY, Jay, is staying SUPERFICIAL. Our relationship is based mainly on looks and social standing.

FRATMAN: We never get to know each other well, so we avoid any messy personality conflicts.

JAY: I guess... your shallowness... runs DEEP.
FRATMAN: Deeper than the deepest keg of Beast Lite.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 3 #306. Parent’s weekend

November 4, 1998

BEN: Parents Weekend's this weekend.
JOHNNY: Mmm-hmm.

BEN: Your parent's comin'?
JOHNNY: Yup. Yours?
BEN: Yup.

BEN AND JOHNNY: (sigh)

BEN: Guess we better dismantle the still.
JOHNNY: I should take down this poster, too.
POSTER: Getting a minimum wage job with a Duke degree is the COOLEST!

1 view Like

Popularity rank 4 #294. Dry on-campus parties vs. off-campus drinking

October 19, 1998

BEN: It's like birds and bees, or "ER" and "Chicago Hope"...
JOHNNY: Quiet, you two! There're more important things than comparitive horniness!

JOHNNY: For example: FREE BEER! As an underage drinker, I'm torn* between lame, "dry" on-campus parties and the dangers of off-campus drinking!
NOTE: * Pun INTENDED! Woohoo! Yeah!

JOHNNY: If only someone could help me...
BEN: MMM, wonder who?
SOUND: sniff

JOHNNY: FRATMAN!
FRATMAN: Hi, kids!
BEN: I'll call you after this storyline blows over....

1 view Like

Popularity rank 5 #146. Return of Fratman

October 7, 1997

WILLIAM: Johnny, I'm concerned. What will the frats' new alcohol policies mean for ME, an average dork?
JOHNNY: I dunno, William, but I think I know who to call...

SOUND: SHAZAM!

WILLIAM AND JOHNNY: FRATMAN!
FRATMAN: Hullo, boys! Sorry I was so pokey; there was a sale at Abercrombie...
LABEL: White Hat of Justice!

1 view Like

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