Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Ben

154 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 16 #332. Don’t got the conch

December 10, 1998

JOHNNY: HEY! It's our tent leader! Julian, say hello to Ben.

JULIAN: Can't Johnny, I don't got the CONCH!
BEN: What does that MEA-

JULIAN: NOOO! You can't talk without the CONCH!!
BEN: OW! Hey! WATCH IT!

BEN: JOHNNY! What's goin' ON?!!
JOHNNY: Nothin', nothin'. Hey, maybe don't mention Jen's pet name for you is "Piggy"...

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Popularity rank 17 #316. Child psychology

November 18, 1998

BEN: This child psychology stuff is interesting... sez here most kids actually believe the WORLD REVOLVES AROUND THEM when they're young.

JOHNNY: At what age do they realize the TRUTH?
BEN: Which is... ?

JOHNNY: Well, that the world revolves around ME!
BEN: RIGHT, right... how silly of me to forget.

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Popularity rank 18 #311. All a dream

November 11, 1998

BEN: I'm sorry it was all a dream, Johnny, but, LOOK, it's not impossible. You'll find someone eventually...
JOHNNY: I KNOW, (sniff) I know.

BEN: Not that it MATTERS, of course... I mean, we're all going to die eventually... (sniff) nothing matters... NOTHING...

BEN: Curse you! You cruel, foul world!

JOHNNY: Note to self: never ask an existentialist to cheer you up...
BEN: (sniff) Th-thanks.

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Popularity rank 19 #306. Parent’s weekend

November 4, 1998

BEN: Parents Weekend's this weekend.
JOHNNY: Mmm-hmm.

BEN: Your parent's comin'?
JOHNNY: Yup. Yours?
BEN: Yup.

BEN AND JOHNNY: (sigh)

BEN: Guess we better dismantle the still.
JOHNNY: I should take down this poster, too.
POSTER: Getting a minimum wage job with a Duke degree is the COOLEST!

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