Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Comics about dating and relationships

52 comics about this topicNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 41 #267. U.S. News rankings

August 1, 1998

JOHNNY: You can't go out? A date with WHO? Carlos from STANFORD? But we... yeah, I know about the RANKINGS, but...

JOHNNY: It's still like we're TIED for third... OK, but sixth is still ADMIRABLE... sort of. But... but, Marcy... BUT... we're still better than STATE!

JOHNNY: Hello?

JOHNNY: FREAKIN' U.S. News and FREAKIN' World Report...
STU: Your move, sir.

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Popularity rank 42 #228. Luckily, we don’t have girlfriends

March 5, 1998

JOHNNY: Ha HA, Ben's out having issues with Jen, and Sorority Girl made Fratman go watch some CHICK FLICK.
WILLIAM: So?

JOHNNY: They're missing the ACC TOURNAMENT, William!! LUCKILY, we don't HAVE girlfriends...

A pause.

WILLIAM: Yeah. Kick ass.

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Popularity rank 43 #204. Average date

January 30, 1998

SOCIOLOGY MAJOR: Well that was the most utterly AVERAGE date I've EVER been on. The dinner was BLAND, the movie, PREDICTABLE. And YOU, well, I, I'm totally indifferent toward EVERY aspect of you.

A pause.

JOHNNY: So... we still on for SATURDAY?
SOCIOLOGY MAJOR: Oh, YES, as a soc. major, I find this CAPTIVATING...

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Popularity rank 44 #199. Not just a meaningless hook-up

January 23, 1998

JOHNNY: So you think SORORITY GIRL may be THE ONE, huh?

FRATMAN: I dunno, it's just... with MOST girls all I think about is having a MEANINGLESS HOOK-UP with them, but with BUFFY...

FRATMAN: I think about having HUNDREDS of meaningless hook-ups!
JOHNNY: AW...

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Popularity rank 45 #197. Meet Sorority Girl

January 21, 1998

SORORITY GIRL: Excuse me, you're MALE. You'll have to leave.
FRATMAN: Look, I'm not DISTURBING anyone, I-

SORORITY GIRL: Don't "LOOK" me. You're violating a sacred rule of rush. I will not have you MOCK the Greek system I cherish so dearly!

FRATMAN: You speak like an ANGEL. What... is your name?
SORORITY GIRL: My GIVEN name is Sorority Girl, but... my sisters call me... Buffy...

SORORITY GIRL: Uh, yeah, so, I,
FRATMAN: So, uh, um, yeah,
BOTH: WANNA HOOK UP?! OR, UH, WHATEVER!

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