Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Subplot of Jordan's Jersey

Coach K's Car

Ben teaches Johnny to drive stick near Cameron. Coach K’s car is parked nearby.

6 comicsFrom the beginning Most popular

#246. Learning to drive stick

April 7, 1998

NARRATOR: Meanwhile...
BEN: All right, now learning to drive stick is easy...

BEN: Now push the clutch and go into first, and pull out.
JOHNNY: Which one is first? This one?

SOUND: CRASH vroom

JOHNNY: My FIRST guess would be no.

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#247. Hitting a car

April 8, 1998

JOHNNY: Is this the airbag?
BEN: No, just some balloon animals I had in the glove compartment.

BEN: You banged up that car PRETTY good. Sign sez it was the basketball coach's spot.

JOHNNY: WHAT?!

BEN: Some guy's coming over here, some little Polish guy, MAN, he is cussing like a SAILOR...
JOHNNY: Ben. GET... IN... THE CAR.

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#248. Hit-and-run on Coach K’s car

April 9, 1998

BEN: Well, we just committed a hit-and-run on Coach K's car.
JOHNNY: Yup.

BEN: Where're we headed?
JOHNNY: I dunno. How far's Cuba?
BEN: I dunno.

A pause.

BEN: On the up side, you seem to have learned how to drive stick OK.
JOHNNY: Yeah, it's amazing what a little adrenaline and a misdemeanor will do....

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#250. Tape in car

April 13, 1998

JOHNNY: Hey, there's something stuck here.
BEN: Didja know Roshown McLeod was arrested?

JOHNNY: Looks like a video tape.
BEN: They say he stole Jordan's jersey.

JOHNNY: The label says "Roshown McLeod".
BEN: Coach K sez he had a video tape that proves Ro innocent, but some kids drove off with it.

JOHNNY: If only this could somehow HELP us.
BEN: McLeod's picture is AWFUL. He looks like a... a BAT....

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#251. Coach K eats lunch

April 14, 1998

NARRATOR: Coach K sits down for lunch.
KRZYZEWSKI: I've got to find those kids who hit my car.

NICK: I know where we could find 'em, coach!
KRZYZEWSKI: WHAT!? You're a... where?

NICK: Honey's! Think about it, when you're on the lam, you want BREAKFAST FOOD!
KRZYZEWSKI: Dear GOD! You're right!

KRZYZEWSKI: You know, you look a lot like WOJO.
NICK: Yeah, I get that a lot.

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