Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Comics about food

13 comics about this topicNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 6 #14. Chicken patties

January 1, 1994

The All NEW (Slippery When Wet) Adventures of

Johnny, the Mediocre Sophomore

SOUND: chomp chew crunch munch

SOUND: WHOOMP!
LABEL: Eyebrows
LABEL: Ditto

JAVON: Jeez, this school is ALREADY falling apart? What is it, a piece of roof or something?

JOHNNY: Actually it's just a chicken patty...

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Popularity rank 7 #393. Dr. Pepper

April 1, 1999

BEN: I'm gonna get a Coke. D'you want anything?
JOHNNY: A Dr. Pepper.

JOHNNY: Hey, what if Dr. Pepper was a REAL doctor? MAN. Well, he wouldn't be a very GOOD one.

JOHNNY: Cuz all he could ever say is "fizz".

BEN: It's like some X-Files episode where they've SUCKED out his brain, but he keeps TALKING.
JOHNNY: Mr. PIBB, I assume, just got a bachelor's degree.

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Popularity rank 8 #383. Sea of soda marketing

March 11, 1999

JOHNNY: Ben, I'm awash in a sea of soda marketing.
BEN: How's that?

JOHNNY: Coke or Pepsi? Regular or diet? And what of Pepsi One? Will it survive? Or will it go the way of the dodo like New Coke and the clear colas?

JOHNNY: Then there's Sprite, should I "obey my thirst"? Go for the Xtreme soda and "Do the Dew"? Or choose 7-up and become an "un"? To which nonconformity should I confrom!

BEN: How 'bout drink the one that TASTES good?
JOHNNY: Ben, there's no need to talk CRAZY!

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Popularity rank 9 #327. Ordering food

December 3, 1998

BARRISTA: Next, please.
JOHNNY: Yes, I'd like an iced mocha latte with extra chocolate.

JOHNNY: Oh, and NO COFFEE.

BARRISTA: But that's... that's just CHOCOLATE MILK.

JOHNNY: Well, WHARTEVER, I don't know all your "lingo"... also give me a portabello sandwich, hold the mushroom, extra ground beef.
BARRISTA: A... a hamburger?

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Popularity rank 10 #325. Greek week

December 1, 1998

JOHNNY: Greetings, all! Today on "Johnny" we celebrate "Greek Week"! We've got tons of GYROS and SOUVLAKI sandwiches, lots of FETA CHEESE, and we're ready to rock!

JOHNNY: So, let's... uh-huh, yeah.... OOOOH... THAT Greek.
FRATMAN: Psst psst

JOHNNY: WELL... what the HELL do I do with all this BAKLAVA?
FRATMAN: Sorry, folks, we'll be back tomorrow with our regularly scheduled Trent jokes.

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