Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Topic

Comics about procrastination

A five-page paper due in five hours, solitaire instead of a problem set, and other sound time management.

17 comics about this topicNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 1 #370. Free cable

February 22, 1999

BEN: Did you pay the cable bill?
JOHNNY: Nope.

A pause

BEN: So it's another night of SCOLA then?
JOHNNY: Quiet! The Russian version of Seinfeld is on, they're waiting in a bread line for a marble rye...

1 view Like

Popularity rank 2 #177. No more TV

November 19, 1997

JOHNNY: Augh! This show is so pointless! All it does is take up a half hour of my time!

JOHNNY: Well that's it! No more mindless time-wasting! NO MORE TV!
SOUND: PUSH!

A pause.

JOHNNY: Except for this one particularly boring half hour block...
TV: Ross! That's a power drill not a toothbrush!

1 view Like

Popularity rank 3 #95. Meet William’s computer, STU

April 15, 1997

NARRATOR: Meet William's computer.
STU: Excuse me, sir?

STU: Shouldn't you finish your problem set that's due in four hours, rather than play solitaire?

WILLIAM: Well, yeah I...
STU: Just a humble suggestion, sir.

WILLIAM: Never should've installed that freakin' artificial intelligence card...
STU: I also have some moral questions about this "Elle MacPherson" directory...

1 view Like

Popularity rank 4 #74. 3:30:00 AM

March 9, 1997

JOHNNY: It's 3:30 AM. My roommates are asleep. I'm tired, very tired.

JOHNNY: I can either START my 5-page philosophy paper that's due in 5 hours...

JOHNNY: OR watch "Bikini Car Wash Babes in Vegas IV"...

JOHNNY: ...freakin' free HBO on Devilvision...
TV: -- "Hey! Maybe WE could wash the cars!"

1 view Like

Popularity rank 5 #73. Handling the loss well

March 6, 1997

BEN: You're handling the loss pretty well there, Mister Write-in...

JOHNNY: Yeah, well, Ben, the people have spoken. I see it as a mandate.

BEN: A mandate? A mandate for what?

JOHNNY: For me to do even less.
BEN: Mmm, always the go-getter. Well, a concise resume is important.

1 view Like

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