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Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

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Topic

Comics about libraries

Often featuring…

  • Johnny

Covered in these storylines…

  • The New Girl from Belgium
  • The New Alcohol Policy

5 comics about this topicNewest firstMost popularOldest first

Popularity rank 1 #33. Library work-study

November 5, 1996

JOHNNY: You know, I'm really starting to dislike the whole work-study thing....
JOHNNY: A man can take only so many hours of book checking...
JOHNNY: Of course, when one gets bored, one's mind turns to evil deeds. Bwah ha hahahahaaaah...
DUKE STUDENT: Hey! 759.5243 S149 W130 is supposed to be AFTER 759.5243 S149 W122, not before it!
JOHNNY: Hmm, how... ODD! Heh, heh...

1 view ♥Like

Popularity rank 2 #11. To the hospital

December 5, 1993

JAVON: Johnny! Are you all right? What happened?
JOHNNY: Yea, yea. I just bruised my ego a little...
JOHNNY: I was following the plan, I was helping her with the computer, and I was just about to get somewhere when all of a sudden I leaned on a bookcase and, well, all heck broke loose.
JAVON: Do you need to go to the hospital or something?
JOHNNY: No, I don't think....
MONIQUE: Johnny, do you need me to go to the hospital with you?
JOHNNY: ... I could survive without going to the hospital.
SOUND: WHUMP!

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Popularity rank 3 #10. Your big chance

December 4, 1993

JAVON: There she is, this is your chance. She's having trouble with the computer. Remember, stick to the plan!
JOHNNY: Stick to the plan, stick to the plan...
ENGLISH TEACHER: Ah I see Williams is making his move on Monique....
JAVON: Yup, everything will be great as long as he sticks to the plan...
SOUND: BOOM! CRASH! WHOOMP!
ENGLISH TEACHER: I'm assuming knocking down 6 bookcases was not part of "the plan."
JAVON: Not exactly...

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Popularity rank 4 #150. Fratman sets it straight

October 13, 1997

FRATMAN: Well, Johnny, I think we've learned some IMPORTANT lessons. FIRST: NEVER go to Perkins. 'Cuz you might lose your hat.
FRATMAN: AND we saw the horrors of "dry" parties. NEVER FORGET: themes are ONLY interesting if you're WASTED. And even THEN, they're only so-so.
FRATMAN: Strange fellow, that Bizarro Fratman. Ran off to some IFC meeting...
JOHNNY: D'you catch his NAME?
FRATMAN: Tom So... Sow... Sow... Something.

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Popularity rank 5 #149. I guess you can have fun without alcohol

October 10, 1997

JOHNNY: Wow, Fratman, I guess you really CAN have fun without alcohol...
BIZARRO FRATMAN: See?
FRATMAN: STOP RIGHT THERE!
JOHNNY: What the... ANOTHER Fratman?
FRATMAN: The REAL Fratman. This PUNK got me lost in foreign territory: PERKINS! He stole the W.H.O.J. and he's been causing TROUBLE ever since.
LABEL: Hathead!
NOTE: W.H.O.J. - White Hat of Justice
FRATMAN: His name's BIZARRO Fratman. We're IDENTICAL except HE doesn't uphold the seventh TENET of Frathood: "Thou shalt give BEER to freshmen. GIRLS. Who are HOT." Poor, sick bastard.
JOHNNY: How do I know you're the REAL one?
FRATMAN: DUH. I speak in GREEK LETTERS. 'Sides, he's got on OUTLET clothes. BLECH.
JOHNNY: OOOoooh.
BIZARRO FRATMAN: HEY! This is J. Crew, baby!

0 views ♥Like

Keep reading

Most popular comics…

  • 1 JOHNNY: What about you, Jay; are you dating anyone?
SOUND: push push push

    No big commitments

    0 3 Feb 10, ’99

  • 2 JOHNNY: Greetings, readers! Shalom and welcome to the exciting world of "Johnny"! I'm the main character of the strip, Jonathan G. Williams. You may remember me from my earlier work in the Chronicle, such as "Guy Watching TV" or "Guy at the Airport"...

    Welcome

    0 3 Jan 15, ’97

  • 3 NARRATOR: A character I never got to introduce: Bob the Pirate.
BEN: Jen! What's the symbol for "radius" of a circle?

    Bob the pirate

    0 2 Aug 15, ’99

  • 4 JAY: I dunno, how do get girls to like you, Johnny?
JOHNNY: Oh, I have a SYSTEM. The firs step is: get to be good friends with them.

    First step to getting girls

    0 2 Mar 25, ’99

  • 5 FRATMAN: Buffy, I... you're just... PERFECT. From your ENCHANTED CLOGS that you superhuman fashion sense, to the aptly named, "TIGHT BLACK PANTS OF POWER"...

    Fratman and Sorority girl fall in love

    0 2 Jan 22, ’98

Porter Mason holding up his book Cute Animals for Flawed People, The Complete Roonie the Rabbit, Book 1

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Johnny the Mediocre Human

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© 1993–1999, Porter Mason, All Rights Reserved.