Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Comics about computers

30 comics about this topicNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 26 #131. Of course I like the nose

September 16, 1997

STU: No messages, sir, no. Of COURSE I like the nose, sir. NO, no, nothing, sir. Really. REALLY. OK. OK. Bye, sir.
SOUND: (click) sniff sniff

SOUND: sniff sniff

SOUND: (click) dialtone beep bop boop boop beep bop bop boop beep bop boop (telephone) ring (telephone) ring

STU: Yes, I've got a coupon for one electronic ASS. Yes, the BOOTY 2000. Ah, x-large. With the optional SCRATCHING component. That's WILLIAM STANLEY...

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Popularity rank 27 #130. Trying out the electronic nose

September 15, 1997

JOHNNY: ALL my people right here right no- oh, hey, STU, what's new?

STU: WELL, sir bought me an electronic nose to quell my desire for A BODY. Now he's creating smells to initialize the thing.
SOUND: sniff

WILLIAM: STU, this has a hint of rosemary in it, see if that does much for you- oh, hey, Johnny. I borrowed your tennis shoes.
SOUND: sniff sniff

JOHNNY: NO, I meant more like: "Did I get any calls?"
STU: Oh, and I've started wearing Polo Sport...
SOUND: sniff sniff

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Popularity rank 28 #127. Android body parts catalog

September 10, 1997

WILLIAM: Well, STU, I picked up a catalog of android body parts!
STU: Faboo, sir!

STU: Oh, look! Here's the whole package! A FULL human body complete with ALL five sense organs AND plug 'n' play limbs!
COMPUTER SCREEN: cover of Pinkerton by Weezer

WILLIAM: Only $13,999,999,95 plus S+H.
BOOK: Human Body Parts 'r' Us: Get on our mailing list. Please. We got tons of these things. It's getting kinda crowded in here.

WILLIAM: Maybe there's a TOENAIL section we could look at or something.
STU: Oo, "The Booty 2000: The only electronic ass with full network support."

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Popularity rank 29 #126. Does this screen saver make me look fat?

September 9, 1997

STU: Sir, does this screen saver make me look fat?
WILLIAM: WHAT?

STU: These horizontal lines, do they make my motherboard look big?
WILLIAM: WHAT? STU, what's wrong?

STU: Nothing really, sir. It's just sometimes I wish my physical manifestation more accurately reflected my intelligence quotient.

WILLIAM: Please repeat that on a UNC reading level for me.
STU: Me want a human body real real a lot, sir.

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Popularity rank 30 #112. Press the letter “J”

June 16, 1997

JOHNNY: Well, let's see what my first big assignment is...

JOHNNY: "Press the letter 'J' 10,000 times. Pause for 10 seconds. Repeat."

Johnny looks closer at paper.

JOHNNY: I'm gaining valuable real world experience. I'm gaining valuable real world experience. I'm gaining....

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