Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Storyline

Ben's Depression

Ben is depressed again, and Johnny has the cure: think less, and live like him, on Cheese Nips and the USA Network.

4 comicsFrom the beginning Most popular

#151. Ben’s depressed

October 14, 1997

BEN: (sigh)
SOUND: (door) SLAM

JOHNNY: Oh, WHAT? Are you DEPRESSED again? Will you just bite the bullet and get some PROZAC already...

BEN: There's a lot of love in this room.
JOHNNY: You want love? Listen to Hanson. I just paid $8 for a SNAPPLE. FREAKIN' Bryan vending machines.

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#153. What’s wrong with Ben

October 16, 1997

JOHNNY: Sorry I blew up, Ben. What's a' matter?
BEN: AH, just life in general...
SOUND: pat pat

JOHNNY: BEN! Your life is GREAT! You make good GRADES! You have lots of FRIENDS! You have an INCREDIBLE girlfriend!

JOHNNY: I don't make good GRADES! I don't have a GIRLFRIEND!

JOHNNY: Now I'M depressed.
BEN: Welcome to the fold.

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#154. Hard bearing your soul

October 17, 1997

BEN: It's just HARD being in a daily comic strip, bearing my SOUL out there 5 DAYS a week.

A pause.

JOHNNY: That's your SOUL?

JOHNNY: Nice SOUL.
BEN: Oh, CRAM it, UPC boy.

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#155. You think too much

October 20, 1997

JOHNNY: Oh, LOOK, this is STUPID!

JOHNNY: You're only DEPRESSED 'cuz you THINK too much! You need to live like ME!
NOTE: Happy b-day pops!

BEN: What, by eating Cheese Nips and watching the USA Network?

JOHNNY: RIGHT! OOO, look, "La Femme Nikita"! Mmm...
BEN: It's WORKING, my brain just made a squooshing sound...
TV: USA: The cure for the common education.

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