Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

STU the Computer

27 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 16 #317. Message from William

November 19, 1998

STU: New message, Johnny, from William Stanley.
SOUND: sniff

JOHNNY: OH! Our old roommate! Your owner! The CPS major who's in the "Duke in Cyberspace" program and exists now only as a series of digital bits! Why's it taking so long?
NOTE: Expository panel

STU: He attached his entire soul and being as a file.
JOHNNY: Oh. WOW.
SOUND: sniff sniff

JOHNNY: He could've just sent a quick "hello"...
STU: I hope his soul converts to Word...

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Popularity rank 17 #305. Consulting interview

November 3, 1998

STU: The olfactory sensors are picking up something....
SOUND: sniff

STU: Smells like fresh resume paper, cheap cologne, and intense, piercing fear.
SOUND: sniff sniff

JOHNNY: WHERE'S MY POWER TIE?! WHERE'S MY #@0%& POWER TIE?!!

STU: Didn't realize Johnny had an interview with Anderson today...
SOUND: sniff

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Popularity rank 18 #304. STU and ACES

November 2, 1998

STU: Anyone there? Johnny? Ben? Hello?
SOUND: sniff sniff

SOUND: sniff sniff sniff

SOUND: CLICK beep boop beep beep beep beep beep... riiiiing..... riiiiiing....
SOUND: sniff

PHONE: CLICK Welcome to ACES, the Duke University Automated Computer Enrollment System. During your call, you...
SOUND: sniff
STU: Talk dirty to me, baby....

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Popularity rank 19 #267. U.S. News rankings

August 1, 1998

JOHNNY: You can't go out? A date with WHO? Carlos from STANFORD? But we... yeah, I know about the RANKINGS, but...

JOHNNY: It's still like we're TIED for third... OK, but sixth is still ADMIRABLE... sort of. But... but, Marcy... BUT... we're still better than STATE!

JOHNNY: Hello?

JOHNNY: FREAKIN' U.S. News and FREAKIN' World Report...
STU: Your move, sir.

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Popularity rank 20 #259. Smelll of philosophy major

April 24, 1998

STU: Hmm... what's that smell?
SOUND: sniff sniff

STU: Coffee, nicotine, intellectualism, and bull droppings.
SOUND: sniff sniff

A pause.

STU: I guess Ben finally declared that philosophy major...
SOUND: sniff sniff

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