Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny

302 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 291 #118. Sprucing up apartment

August 2, 1997

JOHNNY: Well. This apartment could sure use some sprucing up, perchance some rearranging.

JOHNNY: Lessee... what could we change? AH!

Johnny moves a table slightly.

JOHNNY: Well that just opens up all kinds of new space!

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Popularity rank 292 #117. Financial aid

August 1, 1997

JOHNNY: Here's that form from the bursar's office stating that I have and never will watch "Nick at Night" for a period of over two hours....

FINANCIAL AID LADY: Well, the financial aid office thanks you for your cooperation. Now let me just file this away.
SOUND: rrrrip

FINANCIAL AID LADY: Now, take THIS form, run thirty yards east, and, using only the powers of mime, get it signed by 27 people, named "Ralph".

JOHNNY: Is the plan here just to break my spirit....
FINANCIAL AID LADY: No, no, that's phase 3. We're just in phase 1, "Whirlwind Confusion".

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Popularity rank 293 #116. Play it casual

July 16, 1997

JOHNNY: Maybe the best thing to do is just not even let on I notice she's there, play it casual, play it-

Johnny peeks out of his cubicle.

JOHNNY: 1:45pm - Subject walks to water fountain. 1:47pm - Subject drinks water for 4.7 seconds. .5 more than normal.

JOHNNY: -cool, not let her get to me, not even pay the slightest attention....

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Popularity rank 294 #114. Perfect opportunity

July 2, 1997

JOHNNY: The woman of your dreams is sitting 3-feet away from you.
SOUND: crumble

JOHNNY: You've waited for an opportunity to talk to her, to meet her. And now....

JOHNNY: Now is a perfect time to, to just, to....

CO-WORKER: Lunch break!
JOHNNY: ... GO EAT LUNCH!

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