Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Johnny the Mediocre Human

Comics from Duke in the '90s

Nick the Squirrel

45 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 6 #286. Church

October 7, 1998

NICK: What're ya doing?
MO: Listening to the humans down there.

MO: They congregate once every week. It's like clockwork.
NICK: What do they talk about?
LABEL: Thee Chapel

MO: Well, LESSEE, fathers, sons, ghosts, wine and bread, sheep, and, OH YEAH, crucifixion.

NICK: Sounds like some bizarre FAMILY REUNION.
MO: ...and they seem to be really into new wave ORGAN music.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 7 #273. How many stars

September 18, 1998

MO: How many stars you make out?
NICK: I dunno. Twenty or thirty.

MO: There're zillions you know.
NICK: Well, I only SEE twenty or thirty.

MO: So what about the rest?
NICK: Who has time for what they can't see?

MO: Somebody, hopefully.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 8 #262. Good luck on exams

April 29, 1998

JOHNNY: Good luck on exams and congrats seniors!

BEN: Have a bourgeoisie summer.
JEN: Dear LORD, honey, you don't let up with this cynicism thing, do you?

FRATMAN: Sknxx az vrok sneb adwbozt!
SORORITY GIRL: Some of us took a little too long of a "study break"...

MO: The answers are: 1. True, 2. Conjugated dienes, 3. Dali, 4. George Bush, 5. Not unless beer money is low and you are directly propositioned.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 9 #251. Coach K eats lunch

April 14, 1998

NARRATOR: Coach K sits down for lunch.
KRZYZEWSKI: I've got to find those kids who hit my car.

NICK: I know where we could find 'em, coach!
KRZYZEWSKI: WHAT!? You're a... where?

NICK: Honey's! Think about it, when you're on the lam, you want BREAKFAST FOOD!
KRZYZEWSKI: Dear GOD! You're right!

KRZYZEWSKI: You know, you look a lot like WOJO.
NICK: Yeah, I get that a lot.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 10 #237. Expressing feelings

March 25, 1998

MO: I like to express my feelings as much as possible. I let everyone know my situation all the time. I'm unburdened and there's no question as to my stance on things.
NICK: Doesn't everybody have enough problems on their own? What if your feelings adversely affect their lives? Aren't you just shifting the burden to someone else?

MO: Well, YEAH. I call it "emotional hot potato".
NICK: I prefer "emotional JENGA".

1 view Like

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